Sunday, December 7, 2008

Selfishly Yours!

The other day, I was vagabonding on the net, trying to see if there was something that would interest me. I donno why, but the internet has never appealed to me. Sorry, but that's the truth. I know that this might make some people extremely angry (I can already think of a few names), but somehow I have never really been 'hooked' to the net as some people are. Yes, sometimes of course, it has been amazingly a convenient medium, helpful (those bills would have been a real pain, if I had to stand in a queue to pay them), has given me things I needed and wanted (like my songs/videos/blogs). But if there was something I could do without in my life, it might very well be the internet.

But the net is not what I want to talk about right now. As I was vagabonding, I discovered a site to download music (yippee, another one bites the dust!) and found some songs that I had long forgotten. Of course I downloaded them, just for old times sake. As I listened to them, believe me, I felt like I was reliving everything that happened at the time these songs were out. It's amazing how music can transport us to long forgotten times and places, and bring back memories we never knew we stored in that fuzzy brain of ours. And in that playlist, up comes this song - "I Just Don't Know What To Do With Myself". I'm sure that some of you might remember the song - it also features in the soundtrack for the movie - My Best Friend's
Wedding. For those who don't know the song, here's a snippet. It's about a lady singing that she doesn't know what to do with herself, now that her love has gone in search of another and that she's always made plans for two, and nothing seems good anymore, and that she will be waiting if he ever decides to come back. Phew!

At one point in time, I actually liked this song. I felt that the lyrics were soulful, it evoked the empathy/sympathy that one needs to shower at someone feeling so down... it kinda sense. But now as I sit listening to it, for probably the 5th time since I downloaded it, I don't know why, it just doesn't make sense anymore! And that kinda surprises me. I thought it would always make sense. Guess I was wrong! Maybe things just changed for me to think that it would always make sense. From thinking that it was justified, I am now of the opinion that people can be really dumb!.... errr..... in love :) I mean who in their right mind would say -
"Baby if your new love, ever lets you down, come back, I will be around, just waiting for you."Yes, I do understand that this is someone who is very desperate and really does not know what to do with themselves. Maybe they should get a haircut! But seriously, does someone say that in today's times? Yes, again, I do understand and realize that some ppl mite :) Maybe they didn't try the haircut after all ;)

Anyways, the more I listened to it, the more the song began to irritate me, and I realized that I was not that person anymore who could find justification in that song. And you know what? I was OK with that! Personally, I am not a 'change' person. I don't like change, routine is my best friend :) But lately I have understood, that what I detested... has actually become my ally now. Change is my new best friend. And you know why? Because I decided to be selfish! Yes... you heard me right... selfish. Yup! That's the new me. And that is exactly why the song does not make sense to me anymore. Because if the lady was clever (read selfish) enough to understand what was going on, she would have left the idiot long before he left her. And she would have better things to do in life than sit and brood and sing that dumb song. That is precisely why I decided to turn selfish (now... don't jump to conclusions. No one left me :) ). Because I have better things to do in 'my life'. Because it is my life, and no one else's. No one is gonna come and tell me what to do, how and when to do it, why to do it. So why bother waiting or thinking they should? Why not take charge of something only you can make happen. Ya ya... being selfish is not something that our proud parents taught us about, and I am glad they
didn't. I figured this out all by myself.

"You don't get things unless you make them happen,
things don't happen unless you want them to, and you won't want them to unless you think about yourself sometimes!"

Try it. Believe me, it works!!

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