What is the difference between lying and not telling the truth? I used to think that both are the same, but I recently found out that they are not. Lying involves masking the truth by saying something that isn't true or is relatively close but not completely. Not telling the truth can be as simple as keeping mum or spinning a story totally out of context, one that is nowhere near the truth. Am I correct in my understanding? Maybe, Maybe not. As much as I would like to get to the bottom of this, somehow it seems like a never ending well. I am not very good at lying and at not telling the truth. Anything and everything I feel inside usually comes out through my face. Now some might say this is good… me being a true soul and all ;) But more often than not this has always acted to my detriment. And this recent situation was no different. I found myself ‘lying’ for apparently no reason at all. I could have told the truth, but something inside me told me to deny it… to mask it… to not let it come out !! I seriously donno why I did that… but there was so many voices inside me that collectively all I could hear was ‘don’t let the truth come out’.
I don’t think lying is a crime or a sin or anything wrongful. Yes, it is something we should avoid and restrain ourselves from doing because it is not very often that we feel good about it. But, yes, sometimes we do have to lie – for ourselves, for others, to set things right, to make someone feel better. So do these situations qualify as situations for not telling the truth? Should we hold a husband's response of "Of course not, honey!" to his wife's "Do I look fat in this dress?" as lying? I donno. The demarcation is still so vague and immeasurable that it kind of makes me feel very uncomfortable. There was a time when I never used to lie… never! Somehow that time doesn’t exist anymore… that same me doesn’t exist anymore. That doesn’t mean that I lie to make my world fall in place, but the fact that I even do is something out of the ordinary.
When I think about all the situations where I could have done something about not telling the truth or having lied, I do feel a tinge of disappointment, at myself, for having resorted to something I never thought I would. But I have realized that the world is not what it used to be. And we cannot be what we planned out to, unless we care a damn about any and every one who stands to correct us. I would gladly do that (care a damn, I mean), but I feel that before I do, I should rest my ass on firm ground so that even if I have to fall back, I have something to fall onto, instead of the never ending hole of losing oneself.
Gibberish? Yes :) I don’t lie to myself to make me feel better ;)
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
You can have everything!
Why is that we think we can’t have all we want and then some more? I know it might sound a stupid question for those unimaginably perfect souls who would love to disagree with me. And I am not one who cribs and cries every time something does not go as planned (even though I have done that a couple of times :)) But generally, is it just us or the entire universe that conspires against us for not making an absolutely perfect time last forever? All that crap about happiness and sadness, day and night, joy and sorrow and any other euphemism as being the 2 sides of the same coin, seems to be a whole bunch of pessimistic talk.
There was a ‘era’ when I believed in all of this…. you know, the lose some, gain some, one door closes, another opens... blah blah. It is safe to say that I have probably lost the last remaining faith in these sayings. Today, I don’t know why, but for some reason, I woke up with the thread that I can and will have everything I want to and then some more. That I will not lose anything till I say it’s lost and that door will not close till I want it to close. I know, this probably sounds a bit arrogant, over-confident, overtly ideal etc. etc. etc. But you know what, I have been on both sides of that coin and I can assure you that no side is a place you want to be complacent in. You have to leave the coin to be able to see it shine! I don’t deny the concept of fate or the fact that everything happens for a reason. I am a staunch believer in that. But when it comes to dealings in your own life, whose hold do you want the reins to be in? Fate? Destiny? God? Or your own hands, heart, and brain?
When we think about in terms of something that we can achieve, but would like to see how it goes, by letting it out there and allowing it to be molded in whichever manner, we need to understand that we have already lost it. To expect it to come back to us as how it was destined to be is sheer stupidity. The problem with us is... we don’t want to get the message - the message that we are responsible and totally at fault for whatever we do in life. If you are going to let something ‘happen’ to you, you are again at fault for believing that the happening will turn out the way you want it to. Instead of that, why not do it yourself in the first place? Why wait for that damn door to close before you wish for something else to open. I don’t recall Newton writing any 2nd, 3rd, or 4th law that goes anything like that. Are we so dumb enough to believe that some superior power put us all here so that we can eventually leave it all up to Him to decide for us? Just imagine what He must be going through!! Hope he's not cursing us for our incapacity to understand what He really made us for.
It doesn’t come that easy, I know. There are people who leave everything to the world so that they don’t have to be responsible for what really happens to them (I personally know quite a few of that kind!). Either they are way too smart or just plain cowards. The problem with leaving everything to the world, as per what I have seen, is that you will have no other choice but to accept what comes back to you, whether you like it or not. And the truth is, most of the times you won’t. On the other hand if you take the reins, you know exactly what to expect, what you really want to do about it, where it is headed. Today I decided to have everything I want - in my life, from my life, of my life – and then some. I know it will be difficult initially to get rid of the supposedly ‘altruistic’ attitude that we superficially apply. But I have realized that I exist because I am and that I can do, make, give, have, take and live ‘my’ life.
How about you?
There was a ‘era’ when I believed in all of this…. you know, the lose some, gain some, one door closes, another opens... blah blah. It is safe to say that I have probably lost the last remaining faith in these sayings. Today, I don’t know why, but for some reason, I woke up with the thread that I can and will have everything I want to and then some more. That I will not lose anything till I say it’s lost and that door will not close till I want it to close. I know, this probably sounds a bit arrogant, over-confident, overtly ideal etc. etc. etc. But you know what, I have been on both sides of that coin and I can assure you that no side is a place you want to be complacent in. You have to leave the coin to be able to see it shine! I don’t deny the concept of fate or the fact that everything happens for a reason. I am a staunch believer in that. But when it comes to dealings in your own life, whose hold do you want the reins to be in? Fate? Destiny? God? Or your own hands, heart, and brain?
When we think about in terms of something that we can achieve, but would like to see how it goes, by letting it out there and allowing it to be molded in whichever manner, we need to understand that we have already lost it. To expect it to come back to us as how it was destined to be is sheer stupidity. The problem with us is... we don’t want to get the message - the message that we are responsible and totally at fault for whatever we do in life. If you are going to let something ‘happen’ to you, you are again at fault for believing that the happening will turn out the way you want it to. Instead of that, why not do it yourself in the first place? Why wait for that damn door to close before you wish for something else to open. I don’t recall Newton writing any 2nd, 3rd, or 4th law that goes anything like that. Are we so dumb enough to believe that some superior power put us all here so that we can eventually leave it all up to Him to decide for us? Just imagine what He must be going through!! Hope he's not cursing us for our incapacity to understand what He really made us for.
It doesn’t come that easy, I know. There are people who leave everything to the world so that they don’t have to be responsible for what really happens to them (I personally know quite a few of that kind!). Either they are way too smart or just plain cowards. The problem with leaving everything to the world, as per what I have seen, is that you will have no other choice but to accept what comes back to you, whether you like it or not. And the truth is, most of the times you won’t. On the other hand if you take the reins, you know exactly what to expect, what you really want to do about it, where it is headed. Today I decided to have everything I want - in my life, from my life, of my life – and then some. I know it will be difficult initially to get rid of the supposedly ‘altruistic’ attitude that we superficially apply. But I have realized that I exist because I am and that I can do, make, give, have, take and live ‘my’ life.
How about you?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)